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By Janet Peters

After my husband passed away in ’03, it was the knowing and familiarity of being with that person for 39 years that I missed.  For all those years: my awareness, nervous system and soul were conditioned what to expect, those familiar responses.  Then he was gone and newness, just newness was unveiled to me.

Some people would equate this to pure luck, destiny…getting away from an abusive relationship.  A way out, now your world is your oyster to some respect.  Don’t believe it, for too much novelty, change can chafe you as water can eventually erode rock.  Time, you say, each day can be made timeless, but each day can be like a blank piece of paper and the writer waits for those first words.  That spark of inspiration where forethought can take over spontaneity, and risk being fully alive. That’s what widows, widowers, and those who have lost their soulmates feel like everyday; the making of a new life by creating something that has never existed before…feeling sometimes strange, foreign and exhausting.  At these times, familiarity can feel pretty good.



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